Sexual Intelligence: What We Really Want from Sex–and How to Get It Reviews

Sexual Intelligence: What We Really Want from Sex–and How to Get It

Sexual Intelligence: What We Really Want from Sex--and How to Get It

Enjoyable sex: it’s not about technique or a perfect body or being hopelessly, passionately in love. It’s about Sexual Intelligence.

In his three decades of working with couples and individuals as a sex therapist and marriage counselor, Dr. Marty Klein has continually seen that although most people say what they want from sex is pleasure and closeness, that’s not what they focus on during sex. Instead, we’re preoccupied with how we look, what our partner is thinking, how we’re performing, and whether we’re “normal.” We do more thinking, worrying, and judging than experiencing. Sex like that can’t thrill us, can’t create intimacy, and can’t, well, feel sexy.

In Sexual Intelligence, Klein shows how to stop observing ourselves during sex, ending our obsession with sexual performance and sexual normality. “I don’t help people ‘function’ better during sex,” he says. “I teach people how to relax and enjoy sex with the body they have, the partner they have, in the situation they have.” Now that’s something we all want: fulfilling, exciting sex at every stage of our lives.

In Sexual Intelligence, Klein challenges our understanding of sex, love, intimacy, romance, and satisfaction. After all, sex isn’t just an activity. Change the way you think about sex, and you can change your sex life—forever.

List Price: $ 25.99

Price: $ 12.44


3 Comments so far »

  1. Charlie said,

    Wrote on October 6, 2012 @ 3:55 am

    9 of 9 people found the following review helpful
    5.0 out of 5 stars
    a must read if you want to understand sex, March 12, 2012
    By 
    Charlie

    This review is from: Sexual Intelligence: What We Really Want from Sex–and How to Get It (Hardcover)

    Sexual Intelligence is a really easy book to read. Klein’s information is very straightforward and quite accessible. But that doesn’t mean you’ll get through it all in one sitting, because you’ll find yourself putting it down and thinking a lot about a story, or a suggestion, or an example. Odds are that you’ll find yourself reflected back from the page somewhere along the way, but don’t let that scare you. Klein’s compassion is so clear that it becomes more of a revelation than a threat.

    In addition to offering lots of great information about each of the components of Sexual Intelligence, Klein also discusses some of the common obstacles to developing it, how to respond to the sexual effects health issues & aging, and letting go of the idea of sexual success or failure. I really do wish I’d had this book when I was younger, if only because it would have helped me respond to some of the difficulties that I faced. But no matter where you are on your life’s path, if you want to get the most out of sex and relationships, there’s something here for you.

    I don’t think that this book will replace the amazing how-to books and movies that are available because even with Sexual Intelligence, people still need to learn how to explore and enjoy the many kinds of sexual pleasure that are available to them. And I think that it offers a solid starting point for figuring out how to get the most out of sex and our relationships. So I’m giving this book a big thumbs up!

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  2. Douglas Braun Harvey said,

    Wrote on October 6, 2012 @ 3:58 am

    8 of 9 people found the following review helpful
    5.0 out of 5 stars
    Telling the truth about sex and contemporary sexual relationships, March 12, 2012
    By 
    Douglas Braun Harvey (San Diego, CA, US) –

    This review is from: Sexual Intelligence: What We Really Want from Sex–and How to Get It (Hardcover)

    What I really wanted out of Dr. Marty Klein’s new book was a synthesis of the many times I have listened to him present his sex therapy ideas and clinical work. I wanted his brash sense of humor, his ability to integrate sociological influences with sexual complaints. I wanted to hear his vision for liberating sexuality from the curse of “normal” or “mind blowing” to the everyday realities of our thoughts, emotions and body as the vehicle for our sexual pleasure and connection. I wanted Dr. Klein’s unique talent for describing how collective sexual/cultural blind spots symbiotically suck the life out of so many women and men’s sexual passion. I wanted his synthesis of sexual intelligence within couples or individual therapy. I wanted a sex therapist resource as well as a book I could suggest to clients. I wanted a fresh perspective on age old sexual problems. I wanted a resource that archives his mindful presence for holding a client’s unhappiness while shifting their focus to “the other stuff” like emotional needs, reassurance, validation and the relief that comes with intelligently passionate sex. I feel torn in describing this book as a success. The very idea of “the perfect sex book that blends everything I have been waiting to hear from Dr. Klein” runs the risk of sounding like the very same tyranny Dr. Klein is asking the reader to intelligently let go of in our sexual lives. This book is guaranteed to disappoint, it must, it is about sex. Adult sex integrates shattered sexual myths in order to find an authentic space in which to enjoy our mind, heart and body. Sexual Intelligence teaches us how to use our disappointment to create an ever expanding space for sexual connecting. Enjoy this book as much as you can and then become interested in what disappoints. Each is illuminating.

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  3. Dr. Edita Ruzgyte said,

    Wrote on October 6, 2012 @ 4:40 am

    7 of 8 people found the following review helpful
    5.0 out of 5 stars
    Wonderful book, March 15, 2012
    This review is from: Sexual Intelligence: What We Really Want from Sex–and How to Get It (Hardcover)

    Sexual Intelligence is a wonderful book–easy to read, relevant to a wide range of situations, and full of interesting ideas and practical suggestions. The case studies are filled with rich detail, and they don’t all end “happily ever after”–the author even includes cases that didn’t work out well; he lets the value of his approach speak for itself. The author’s sense of humor helps move things along–and it’s grownup humor, not the predictable sex-comedy stuff you often see in other books. In summary, the book is enjoyable to read, filled with useful insights, and will help a wide range of people to understand and improve their sexual situations.

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